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Published on December 1st, 2013 | by Omar

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Wisdom from an elder: Love, family, community, friends

I received a call from an aunt today and she shared a piece of wisdom that I took to heart and thought was worth sharing with others. We were talking about a number of things but then she said (translated from the original urdu)

You will never know how much I truly love you. I love you for the sake of your grandmother and all she did for us and the time she spent with us. I love you for the sake of your parents and all the things they have done for me. It’s not a love that exists much in this generation because this generation is just so busy [that they don’t have the ability to spend time with each other to build that level of love].

It hurt hearing that but it’s absolutely true. My generation doesn’t really spend time really connecting with others. Facebook seems to be enough. Post some pictures or a status update and we’re good. There isn’t much depth to our relationships. I personally don’t make the time to get together with friends as often as I should. How often have you seen someone somewhere and said “We should get together soon” but weeks, months or years go until the next time you see the same person and say the same thing.

I was asking my kids and wife tonight about what’s most important to us and we all said family and friends. It may be most important to us but what do we do to maintain those relationships? As far as our family goes, not too much. I have family in Pakistan that I don’t keep much contact with. Closer to home, I have family and friends that I don’t really meet up with either. So we were thinking of how we could address this and my elder daughter had a suggestion

We should meet up with someone every week. Either at our place or go to their place.

Simple solution. We plan on doing that going forward insha’Allah. We also plan on hosting and organizing monthly potluck dinners at our place. I want to feel the love my Aunt feels for us and we hope to put in the effort to earn it insha’Allah.

May God bless my aunt for her touching advice and grant her good health. For those of you who found her advice useful, I ask that you please pray for my aunt as well.

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